Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Picky Eater

We've probably had similar posts before, but the answers change with different ages. So I'm asking again for advice about my picky eater. She's about 3 1/2 mos. shy of turning 3. And somehow, despite the fact that my husband and I are not picky eaters, she has become one. The problem is, she won't try anything that isn't one of her norms. What I'm wondering is how forceful I should be at this point. Is she young enough that it's a stage she may grow out of, or is it one of those things that if I don't crack down now, it'll only get worse? My husband and I have learned the hard way that certain habits are harder to break the longer they go on. For instance, we used to be lax about her sitting at the table with us for dinner, until it got out of control and she would take one bite and then run around. So now, dinner time is full of time outs and warnings (so enjoyable) as we undo that damage.

I don't necessarily make her a separate meal. But I do modify what we're having. For instance, if we're having tacos, she might get a plain cheese quesadilla. Or if we have a casserole with chicken in it, I set aside plain chicken for her before I add it to the casserole. Should I just be saying, "You eat what we eat, or nothing at all" instead? It seems harsh at her age, and I worry about her going hungry, because she is incredibly stubborn. But I want to do what's best for the long run, so HELP!
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4 comments:

The Stump Clan said...

Umm, I am totally there with you- with my 16 month old!! If it is something she likes- like pizza- she will eat two full slices! If it is pasta- she will spit out the first bite and refuses to take another! I would say at Skyler's age she is probably at the point where the problem could just get worse and you might want to start with the "you eat what we eat method". We had this with Austin some- and we stopped making him separate meals and eventually he just knew to eat the food- whether he liked it or not. (and he now likes most of it!) But again- every child is different- that is just what worked for us. Good luck- we are trying to figure out what to do with Kalli!!

June 10, 2009 at 6:25 AM
Jen L said...

We do a little bit of both. Margaret MUST try everything on her plate. After she tried everything at least once she is allowed to get down (she is not allowed to leave the table until she has at least tasted the food) or to have dessert with us, or whatever the consequence may be. We found this to be a happy medium since she is still trying new things. It also helps to be with some other kids eating the same thing. So have a dinner party or something and make the other child's favorite veggie, or whatever it is, and reference to the other child eating it. It worked with Margaret and milk. SHe wouldn't touch it until she saw a 5 year old friend drinking it. Just a thought.

June 10, 2009 at 7:32 AM
katie said...

I know we talk about this all the time, and how I totally don't have this problem. Reagan will eat just about everything. I used to play games with her to get her to try new things, but now I just tell her to eat it and she does. Have you tried counting it with her? I tell Reagan she has to eat 5 bites of something and then she can have her blueberries or whatever. I also make sure she always has some fruit with every meal because that is her absolute favorite. Kennedy started throwing and spitting her food about a month ago. I cracked down on her immediately. Slapped her hand (softly) when she threw the food a few times, she cried and then she was done. Now she eats everything I give her too. She really enjoys eating with utensils and with a fun plate. That might help. I am just of the mind set that if I stop the bad habit now (even if it is super hard) then it will be so worth it if I don't have to deal with the problem anymore in the future. Good luck!

June 10, 2009 at 9:42 AM
Liz said...

a few of the tips that I give my parents who ask me this in feeding therapy...

1-be consistent with whatever policy you go with!
2-yes, sit at the table! it goes with the consistency
3-have positives at every meal! If you can forsee that the tacos are going to be an issue, make sure she also has grapes or something she DOES like to keep things happy!
4-try to end on a positive note so that she doesn't start to hate eating and meals in general
5-talk about your food! in NEUTRAL words, not yucky, icky, etc. but wet, cold, warm, sweet, sour, etc. and talk to each other at meals so it's a social event as well
6-always strive for a good variety at every meal. a starch, a protein and veggies/fruit at every meal or snack plus a good variety of textures. If she's having a soft, chewy quesadilla, make the veggies crunchy, etc.

and yes, of course remember that she's a toddler, stubborn and no she won't starve! :) my toddler goes through major phases with eating! for a few weeks she'll eat like a bird until I'm starting to be concerned and then she'll pig out for a few days! usually on the wrong things of course! :) good luck!

June 12, 2009 at 1:19 PM

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